Belittling Children

Belittling Children -يَا أَبَا عُمَيْرٍ مَا فَعَلَ النُّغَيْرُ ‏

There was a little boy who had a little sparrow.

This little sparrow died, so the Prophet wanted to cheer the little boy up and said:

يَا أَبَا عُمَيْرٍ مَا فَعَلَ النُّغَيْرُ ‏
“O ABU OMAIR! WHAT HAPPENED TO THE LITTLE SPARROW??”

[“Abu Dawud”, 4969 – Sahih].

ABU OMAIR – أَبَا عُمَيْرٍ – was his nickname, it literally means: THE FATHER OF OMAIR.

He was just a little boy – yet, the Prophet called him “THE FATHER of Omair.”

The Prophet’s daughter was named ‘ ام كلثوم ‘ UMM KULTHOuM (The MOTHER of KulthoUm) – when she was still in a cradle.

The scholars said:

This teaches us NEVER to belittle children – but to BIG them up.

When we call children with nicknames like “ABU – Father Of …” (يا أبا فلان), they feel big – like they are fathers (كأنهم آباء).

When we call them “UMM” and “ABU”, these nicknames come laden with responsibility (المسئولية).

They will feel appreciated, respected by others and big in their own eyes (فإنه يعظم في نفسه ويكبر في عين نفسه).

Psychologists say that this will BOOST their self-esteem and confidence in life.

At all costs: AVOID belittling children because it will scar and tarnish them for life.

It will kill their self-esteem and they will feel worthless.

They will grow up fragile and with insecurities.

Children tend to believe what their parents say – even if its untrue.

Did you know that some parents hire LEADERSHIP trainers to train their children to become future leaders – even when they are still in NURSERY (Kindergarten)?!

Yes – it all starts very early.

So praise them, don’t belittle them.