Controlling Parents

Some parents are control-freaks …

They want to micro-manage and get involved in every decision of their children, even after they’ve grown up.

Ibn Daqiq al-Eid said:
فلا يجب على الولد طاعتهما في كل ما يأمران به ، ولا في كل ما ينهيان عنه باتفاق العلماء
“It is not obligatory for the (adult) child to listen to a parent in each and every matter that they ask of him or prohibit to him – and this is by the consensus of the scholars.”
[“Al-Iḥkaam”, 2/296].

Obedience to parents is required, but not unconditional.
Even after their kids are married, some parents want to make every decision in their lives.
They feel that their authority will be undermined if their will is not implemented.
The truth is, parents need to give their children a good upbringing, and then let them make their own decisions.
Advice them, but give them some space …
Give them responsibilities and have faith in them.
Don’t be over protective.
Let them make mistakes and learn.
It is said: “A TREE WHICH GROWS IN THE SHADE OF ANOTHER TREE WILL REMAIN SMALL.”